Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Smoking break

I've had a great Queensday on which I smoked one cigarette after another. No matter which concert or pub I went, I trail of smoke followed me like I was a human steamtrain. But now, for 1 month, all of that is over. A couple of weeks ago I made a challenge that I regret already: I'm going to stop smoking for 1 whole month.

I think it's not going to be a really difficult task for me. Last year (also in May) I stopped drinking alcohol for 1 month and that was much harder. As everybody who has seen me at a party knows, I didn't exactly learn anything from this abstinence (apart from the fact that without alcohol life becomes boring as hell). But apart from that it was good to know that I can take my hands off alcoholic drinks for one month.

On Saturday I was in a club in Antwerp and I really hated being without cigarettes. I like tobacco, especially when I drink alcohol. And when you really crave for something, selective perception is working at its best; so around me it seemed that everybody was smoking except for me.

Maybe in a month I'll feel better about this challenge. I think there's nothing wrong with addiction. As long as you can control your addiction enough to enjoy it. I want to know if I can master smoking. I think I can, but I want to prove it to myself. After a month I'm probably glad I did it, but at this moment I feel like a complete idiot for depriving myself of something I really enjoy.


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